They exist to amuse me.

[spookyevilone]

Nephew: How do you spell 'women'?
Me: Wombyn
Nephew: ... No. Way.
Me: Well, I don't, but apparently there are women who are determined to take the 'men' out of the word.
Nephew: That's stupid.
Me: I agree. It's actually spelled 'women'.
Nephew: (To dad) Dad, did you know some women are spelling it 'wombyn'?
Brother: Yeah. That's why I just call 'em 'broads'.
Nephew: *hysterical laughter* Oh, you're so dead.
Brother: .. You're on the phone with Aunt [Peregrine], aren't you?
Nephew: Uh huh
Brother: Then I'd like to get a postscript in - I would never, not even under torture, ever actually refer to any fine double-x-bearing creature in any manner that would imply disrespect for her inherently divine nature. So please ask her to stop yelling at me.
Nephew: She's not yelling at you.
Brother: Oh, child of mine, yes, she most definitely is.
Nephew: No..? I'm on the phone and she's just listening, not saying anything..
Brother: See?! She's yelling at me with the power of her mind alone! I.. feel the urge to.. go send.. someone flowers.. and .. chocolates.. *door slams*
Nephew: .. He's so weird. You weren't yelling at him. Why did he think you were?
Me: Hypnotic conditioning. I have all my siblings well trained.
Nephew: My family is so weird!
Me: Is that a good or a bad thing?
Nephew: It's a great thing!